Hard Rock Casino

830

Genre: Casino

Format: CD

Developer: JAMDAT Mobile, Inc.

Publisher: JAMDAT Mobile, Inc.

Mac Publisher: MacPlay

Minimum System Requirements: PowerMac G3, Mac OS X, 64MB RAM, 50MB free hard disk space, 800x600 monitor resolution supporting millions of colors

Review Computer: 867MHz G4, 640MB RAM, ATI RADEON 8500, Mac OS X v10.3.2
Network Feature: Yes

Price: $19.99

ESRB Rating: E for Everyone

Availability: Now

Official Website: [url=http://www.macplay.com/games/hardrock.php]http://www.macplay.com/games/hardrock.php[/url]



Perhaps one day down the road, someone will be able to successfully explain to me why casino games continue to be developed for the computer while adventure games wallow in obscurity. Seriously, people, this is the last time I'm going to say this: casino games are completely pointless on the computer. In fact, real casinos are only good for two things: they give wealthy, sixty-year-old widows someplace away from me to smoke their cigarettes, and they help finance Indian reservations.



I hope that last comment didn't offend anyone. I suppose I could've gone for the "they help finance elementary education" joke, but I'm not sure if that's true anywhere outside of Ohio.



Casino games are to game reviewers what MTV produced movies must be to film critics; the banes of our existence. I can't think of one of my peers who gets excited when another computer casino game shows up at the door. On the other hand, I'm told that those online casinos do quite well. I wouldn't know. Since I've switched to Safari and set it to block pop-up windows, I've haven't heard much about online casinos. Regardless, I'm a semi-professional critic. And so, from this point forward, understand I'm writing this review not from the angle of an avid gamer, but (mostly) from that of someone who might actually like computer casino games. I'm not comparing it to Halo or Throne of Bhaal, but to its own competition. This is because, quite honestly, Hard Casino is pretty good within its genre.





The first reason for this, I suppose, is style. The Hard Rock theme I can do without, but I guess it's a good way to tie it in with various styles of rock music throughout the decades (and get name recognition, of course). The game areas are defined by decade, so each is styled by the designs of that time period. What makes this a bit more interesting than it could have been is that you can't just play in whichever decade you like. You'll start in the 50s, and you have to "earn" your way up into the 60s, 70s, etc. As you progress, the games' styles change, your character's clothing changes, and the stakes get higher. It's a computer gambling game with goals to reach, and there's something be said for that.



Now, the money you earn can come from a multitude of casino games: Baccarat, Black Jack, Craps, Keno, Poker, Roulette, Slots and Video Poker. It's been a couple years since I've been to Vegas, but I'm pretty sure that's almost everything. No roller coasters or strippers or Queen musicals, but at least the gambling is covered.



Oh, regarding advancement, you can't just add money whenever you want. You can take out loans from the casino, but I can't imagine that's good advice. In other words, if you want to advance, you have to win. This isn't too terribly difficult to do, but it can take quite some time, especially early on when the stakes are so low. Juts remember, you're "gambling" with fake money. Don't be afraid to take some big risks to speed things along.





The artwork in the various games is pretty good, I suppose. Each game features a colorful playing table or screen, the characters playing the game (yours and your human or computer opponents), and a band across the top that shows a casino floor modeled after one from the era in which you're playing. There are precious few animations, though, which is kind of ridiculous. Las Vegas Poker and Blackjack on the Intellivision had more animation than this game (ah, how I miss that shifty-eyed dealer). This has better sounds than Intellivision's though; the cards sound like cards and not like...well, if you've played the Intellivision game, you know where I'm going with that. As one would expect, casino blips and bleeps abound, and you can hear the shuffling of cards and falling of chips. Oddly, though, there's no background chatter to add ambiance to the game. If you want a real casino experience, you'll have to hire about fifty or sixty of your friends to talk in the next room, smoke all manner of cigarettes and cigars, and spill cocktails on your carpet. Here, all you get is the music, which is patterned after music from the various eras, but isn't music from the various eras. A jukebox allows you to switch songs, but none of them will be familiar. I can't recall if music was playing in the casinos I've visited in my time. I only remember the noises and the calls of dealers. Odd that they wouldn't be featured here.



There's an online version. I wasn't able to find anyone with whom to play when I logged on, but I can't imagine it's all that different from playing the computer...although the human opponents may be a bit smarter. You can chat with the other players, but it'll otherwise look and feel the same as playing by yourself. There's still no real money to be won or lost, but that's probably a good thing.



The interface is decent, although there do seem to be too many windows making sure you want to do what you want to do. Do casino dealers really care so much if you're about to blow all of your money on one hand? I doubt it, but I can't say for sure.





Oh, and then there's this; Hard Rock Casino for the Mac comes with a free version for a Palm device, should you have one. Or maybe the Palm version comes with a free Mac version. I guess it depends on where you are in the store when you buy it. My trusty old Handspring Visor wouldn't run the software, so I can't comment on that version. And so, I end with this...



Hard Rock Casino is a casino game. Just remember that. If you've never liked a computer casino game before, you're not going to like this one. However, if you're the type who plans vacations around Tom Jones' tour schedule or has a hand held digital poker game sitting next to the toilet, then Hard Rock Casino should fill that compulsion for you. It has better variety than most gambling games I've seen, and its objective-based approach will give you goals for which to strive. If I were you, though, I'd strive for something better, like learning to play a real computer game, leaving the casinos where they belong...in deserts, on boardwalks, and near low-income Ohio school districts.



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