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Geeks just wanna have fun
Macworld San Francisco has come and gone, and with it the last of my curmudgeonly foot-dragging. As I noted in a post-keynote editorial, Apple did it, doggone it! -- they just up and did it. I've bitched about the very idea of a "digital lifestyle" for so long, it feels weird to have my shields come down, but there you have it.

With iTunes, iMovie, and now iPhoto, Apple has put all the pieces together. Pieces of what, I'm not real sure, but together it is. Wrap it all up in a blazing-fast hemispherical iMac with a moveable monitor and away you go. I mean, concept- and execution-wise, you gotta give the outfit an "A." I'm still leery as hell about the whole direction of Western culture, capitalism, and the spiritual/econcomic oppression of the middle-class, but the fun factor is getting to me. Even if all this digital consumerism is the modern equivalent of Roman circuses, I'd have to be a masochistic moron not smile after checking out what can be done with iThis and iThat, and especially iPhoto. Wow.

I don't even have it, can't use it yet, but I love the concept. And what a brilliant idea to have the choice of generating all those different prints and an actual glossy-paper hardbound book.. . Yup, Apple has come up with the one app that 'll finally push me over the OS X edge, and you'll be reading about my adventures very soon. Plus, just to show I'm finally mellowing a little, I actually downloaded iTunes! (duh) No, I don't expect a medal for this, but I have to say I'm impressed. The program not only found MP3s I didn't know I had lurking on my hard drives, it also has a built-in Internet radio tuner (double duh). I care about that lots more than burning my own CDs, incidentally, but did I ever hear that feature being touted anywhere? This goes a long way toward explaining what the devil happened to MacTuner. The PRN (performance rights Nazis) haven't completely dimmed the light of Internet radio yet, Allah be praised.

Slick but risky
I can't get over it. They've made it all so easy, or at least it looks easy. iPhoto, for example, greatly simplifies using any printer for cranking out shots. This should be a big help to idiots like me, who only recently discovered that Photoshop can automatically size an image to fit the paper being used, triple-duh. (See John manually resize over and over again...). In fact, this stuff works so easily that a lot of people just won't believe it. This could be a problem.

I frequently do certain tasks the hard way at first (see above). That means I expect them to be difficult, and later I get used to the difficulty. This must explain why so many people use Windows. Well, the only way to break out of that rut is to realize you're shackled, than take 'em off and walk free. You might run into a wall or off a cliff, but at least it'll be your own doing.

Freedom is scary, though. We get used to certain modes of behavior, ways of life, and all the rest. Apple is taking a big leap here with the digital hub marketing angle (begging the question of whether it's worth it or not) but that's also what makes the company so interesting. ("What, no floppy drive?")

And now [drum roll], the Life Lesson!
Well, it looks like my webmaster days are just about over, at least for the time being. Last fall I designed a Web site for a local monthly newspaper. Since then I've been doing daily site updates and archiving in loose exchange for a desk to put my 8600 on, a corner of the office, and an ISDN line. The problem is that working for free (essentially) is an inherently dumb way to make a living, as I've discovered. Only if you're in love, maybe, or if you're reasonably sure you can squeeze some dough out of management down the road. (That ain't likely, however, and I think you know why.)

I'm the only one in the office with any real Mac knowledge. If I'm there, supposedly free to do my own work (Applelinks, web designing, writing, whatever), and somebody has a question, the circumstances don't permit either backing away quietly or getting paid for consulting (bummer!). We did work out a deal whereby I'd get the lion's share of any advertising fees the site could attract, but to make this happen requires even more unpaid time to be put into the project. Besides, what I can do with the site by way of making it more appealing to visitors or advertisers is limited by in-house dynamics, so no, this will not do. By now I figure I've done several thousand dollars worth of work over and above what my share of the office real estate and utilities add up to, and a buzzer in my brain is wailing like a stuck smoke detector. [Memo to John: get paid first next time, quadruple duh!]

I may still end up being the webmaster, but not in "exchange" for sharing the office. I'm moving my trusty 8600 back home, you see, and the paper can pay me with cold cash instead of a desk if it really wants a Web site. This frees up everyone: I'm free to make some real money or die trying, and the newspaper is free to find somebody else to manage their site for, uh, nothing... (Quintuple DUH!) I'll keep you posted on how it goes. In preparation for the move, I fired up the iBook at home last night and went to one of those sites where they measure your connection speed: 24kbps, AAAGHHH!

So, how much does one o' those Cisco 678 DSL modem/router thingies cost, anyway?

NEW HOPE FOR THE WRETCHED: Senior Applelinks editor and columnist John H. Farr may be growing up late, but if he can do it, anyone can. Yay-yass!  

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"HEY, where are the old GRACKs?!"

Currently too busy scrambling to pay the rent and save my marrriage to finish that archive page, but I'll get it posted, never fear. In the meantime, just past any 2001 Monday date into the URL and have a blast.

AUDIO CREDIT: embedded 44k file, European Birds -- Sounds and Sonograms.

DESIGN CREDIT: GRACK! byline graphic by Bob Farr.

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