December 18, 2000

"Merry Christmas (I Think)" features Glory Halleluja and Pass the Bug Juice, We're Off! Author celebrates the end of his third year of FARR SITE writing by driving into the teeth of a horrible blizzard. (Stay tuned for updates!)

December 11, 2000

"Easy Does It, Someday" features Don't Try This At Home! Then Again, Why Not? We cover Florida ("boooo!"), Emailer vs. Outlook Express, and doing everything the hard way. Um, the EASY way. Er. . . ("Take Two!")

December 4, 2000

"Johnny Internet's Island Odyssey" features Weasels Bite My Ankle, Mountains Make My Day. Can Johnny escape the cannibal geek-weasels to fight another day? First we have to get past the drug dealers, strange fauna, rocky cliffs, and big white woofy dogs...

November 27, 2000

"Death at Seven Degrees" features A True Story. The compelling follow-up to something mentioned last week has nothing to do with Macs other than having been composed on one, but this time that's enough. Vaya con Dios, Ms. Sanchez.

November 20, 2000

"Serengeti in the Sangres" features What, Me Worry? I Have Health Insurance! Death, depression, dead mouse, rat menudo, cop buzzards, and UFOs bring a smile to author's face.

November 13, 2000

"Self-Propelled Geranium" features OK, Here's a Buncha JPEGs for Ya! Underwhelming response to column changes evokes massive image dump, plus, "RATS!" (the furry kind).

November 6, 2000

"What It Is" features How To Do What's Never Been Done & Lose Your Shirt! Author takes a whack at silly technology, gazes at navel, and a good time is had by all. (iGoggles?)

October 30, 2000

"Back to Basics" features Nothing But the Facts, Ma'am. Time passes and everything changes: things you think you need, hard drive media, and a whole lot more.

October 23, 2000

"Evolutionary Perspectives" features What If the Times Changed and Nobody Noticed? Steve Jobs in a cardigan with gray hair and two chins is right around the corner. We think he'll know what to do, but will you?

October 16, 2000

"Rockus Interruptus" features Downtown, The Who, & Why XI Might Be Better! Author ponders how walking is good for you, why rock & roll should be LOUD, and whether to trust software older than nine.

October 9, 2000

You Always Hurt the One You Love" features What Do You Mean, There Isn't Any Place to Plug This In? Caution: author's epiphany in the pines may prove hazardous to vicarious thrill-seekers!

October 2, 2000

"Drop That Sheep!" features Why Harpo Is a God, & What Are You Doing to My Kid? Take a break from worrying about AAPL and see what's happenin' at the Pueblo. . .

Sept. 25, 2000

"People Are Everything" features It Takes a Lot to Laugh, It Takes a Fool to Cry. Moving to the mountains with your Mac can teach you a lot of things, just not necessarily what you expect!

Sept. 18, 2000

"Sour Fruit" features Psycho-Babble and Propaganda from the High Desert! The world stands still as author actually talks about Apple and Steve ("NO! Really?!").

Sept. 11, 2000

"Scratch One Dodge" features Boys Will Be Boys, Or Watch Where You Park! A true tale from long ago before Macs existed (how to reinitialize a car!).

Sept. 4, 2000

"Dear Mom" features Hey, Are You Sure You Should Be Reading This? Who ARE you, anyway, the FBI? How'd you find it?! Is this Carnivore?? Hello???

August 28, 2000

"More To It Than That" features Pissing Into the Wind With No Shoes. Author ignores the best advice he's heard in months and jumps off the cliff, Macs and all.

August 21, 2000

"Real Computer Stuff" features What Do You Mean, There's No Nudity? That's right, ma'am, just the facts on how these JPEGs get onto the page -- but can the author claim any credit?

August 14, 2000

"Volcano Monsoon" features What If Mommie Were An Arcturan? Author ventures farther into the unknown and captures it all on his digicam. No ant people or mothership clouds, however.

August 7, 2000

"Omens in the Piñon" features Bird Battalions Attack! Wolves Emerge from Woods! Author tries to divine the shape of things to come but succumbs to what's already here.

July 31, 2000

"Frito Pie and Chrome" features Why Can't Computers Be As Much Fun As This? Chrome that iMac, and don't forget the flame job. (We can have faster Macs if we just goose that G4!)

July 24, 2000

"Summer Hummer Bummer" features How to Kill a Hummingbird, and other News. Hummers and new PowerMac G4 Cubes, unlike fresh fish and just about any part of a pig, should not be fried and set in front of a Frenchman, unless you never want to see them again.

July 17, 2000

"Drumming It Into Our Heads" Rain, Indians, New Macs, New Macs, New Macs! Yes, there will be new hardware. No, it will not glow in the dark or win drag races. (Squeeze it and see if it barks.)

July 10, 2000

"New World, Macworld" features Macworld From a Farr, Backbeats, and How to Pick Up Girls. Go2Mac says only morons have modems anymore, so we've piled on the JPEGs! If you don't have cable or a T1 line, you'll miss the graphic(al) evidence. Hahahahaha!

July 3, 2000

"On the Verge" features Rambling Obscure Nonsense and B-B-Q Critique! Author celebrates outbreak of Universal Abundance with massive load of JPEGs to celebrate the 4th -- or 3rd, as the case may be.

June 26, 2000

"Going Native" features Cattle Mutilations! Dust! Rock Slides! (And Macs, of course!) The pre-Expo news drought is upon us, so your intrepid author decides to join the scene at a local hangout.

June 19, 2000

"Comandante Karma & The Spawn of Satan" features Comandante Karma, Kidnapping, Sex, and More! Violence and torture are the order of the day as the Comandante hauls a bevy of Web monsters off to the sulphur pits. (Mac web meta-news...)

June 12, 2000

"Monkey Wobble Travelogue" features Through the Rez to Utah in Twelve Easy Hours. Author shakes boojum, rattles sadistic simian on visit to famous desert-dwelling Internet columnist.

June 5, 2000

"Dead (?) Horses Are For Beating" features Mexico Remembered, Equine Tragedy Disrepected. "Big Brother Chic? Ya gotta have yer wits about ya in this biz." (And yes, that dog WAS dead!)

May 29, 2000

"Where I Live, Parts One & Two" features Voyeur Alert! Actual Scenes from Real Life! Rain-hungry author takes a break and resorts to plain old show-and-tell in this experimental two-parter.

May 22, 2000

"Cookie Fever: The History of the Eat'emgood Web" features Integrity for the Hungry, Respect for the Aware. Hell, why bother to lighten up now, we've got the bozos on the run!

May 15, 2000

"Ghosts, Smoke, and Free Land" features What A Country, What A World! Learn how you can win 5 acres of New Mexico with a camera and your Mac. (We also read somewhere that "Web pages should be no more than 50k." Hahahahaha!)

May 8, 2000

"Over the Pass" features Huajatolas, A Trip to the Heartland, and Audrey! Another JPEG-laden muse-a-rama from your on-the-road MacMeister and his tangerine iBook.

May 1, 2000

"Ditch Cleaning Day" features How to Help Your Community and Nearly Die! Author falls into acequia and lives, but still limps. (Major JPEG downloads are worth the wait.)

April 24, 2000

"I Carried Jesus!" features We're Not in Kansas Any More, White Boy! Author joins the penitentes in an ancient rite that flips his lid. (This column guaranteed to have been written on a Mac.)

April 17, 2000

"Pinedale Party Pooper" features Don't Try This At Home, Kids! The truth is out there, all right, but are you sure you want to find it? Author finds facts and forges ahead.

April 10, 2000

"Not the Last Picture Show" features Long-Load Special: JPEGs You Won't See in the Brochures! Hit the link and get a drink, they'll be up when you get back. (The real New Mexico)

April 3, 2000

"Kings of Kommentary" features It's Blue! It's White! It's Comfy! It Goes Fast! (I'm Done!) "Say, is that a Pismo in your pocket, or are you just glad to see us? And WHAT did you call me??"

Mar. 27, 2000

"Visions, Vastness, and the American Way" features Help, I Feel Good! What On Earth Could Be Wrong?Maybe it's the new Nikon, the PowerMac, the iBooks, the weather, or the company. Beats me!

Mar. 20, 2000

"Anybody Got Mac?" features You Think Water Isn't Important? Just Drink Your Mac! We meet our neighbors at a "ditch meeting" and learn what makes the world go 'round. Hint: it ain't yer GUI!

Mar. 13, 2000

"Comandante Karma Twists the Knife!" features the Unexpected Return of Comandante Karma! He's Back, He's Mad, He Glows in the Dark! Author's black mood draws mysterious Web entity back from the digital void. ("Time to go to bed, kiddies!")

Mar. 6, 2000

"How Not to Serve" features Sprint, Apple, AirPort, & Greedy Pig-Dogs from Hell! Repeat after me: "It's Only Money, It's Only Money. . ." Feel better now? No?? Say it again!

Feb. 28, 2000

"Giving, Going, Getting" features Breaking Up Is Hard, Standing Still is Worse. Author gives PowerBook to deserving sister, but nothing happens in a vacuum. Adjustments, insights, and compensations all a-jumble, with pictures.

Feb. 21, 2000

"Living in a Mac Town" features Weirdos, Macs, Cars, and Guns! Yee-Haw! Author finds that some aspects of living where he does resembles the way his computer works. ¡Que Milagro!

Feb. 14, 2000

"Day of the Coyote" features Coyotes, Cows, and iBooks in the Snow. Author's iBook gives him a grandstand seat as scavengers invade San Cristobal and the snow flies. And keep that cat inside!

Feb. 7, 2000

"The Internet and the Pastry Hut Cafe" features Uncle Roger's iBook, Easy Running, and Cherry Pie on the Prairie. Email, the Internet, and digital pix make life easier, but what can they do for a rusty tractor?

Jan. 31, 2000

"One More Time, For Jack" features a tribute to really fine father-in-law, who just might have handled the on-the-road trials and tribulations of an Internet editor with more aplomb and a lot more humor.

Jan. 24, 2000

"iBook to iMac Road Trip" features a Road Trip to Tucson! Author takes iBook in hand to charge to Tucson and check up on Mom and her iMac. If the end result is confusion, at least he enjoys the ride.

Jan. 17, 2000

"Virgin in the Flames" features Christmas Eve at the Pueblo! Author climbs back in the saddle, learns how to Think Different in a big way, and gets all smoky in the process.

Jan. 10, 2000

"Forget Macworld" features Porcine Popbeads, MacBorg, Silly Trade Shows, and SF Attitude Adjustment! Real people and culture beat fake news and press releases any day. . . (especially last week!)

Jan. 1, 2000

"Millennium Hijack!" features a Visit from Comandante Karma and His Amazing Manifesto! Warning: Excessive Profanity, Obscenity, Violence, and Sex with Animals.