Retro Review: Obsidian

By: Kirk Hiner

Genre: Adventure/Puzzle

Platform: MacOS

Format: CD ROM

Developer: Rocket Science

Publisher: SegaSoft

Minimum requirements: 80 Mhz PowerPC processor, System 7.5.3, 16MB RAM, 1 MB VRAM, 4X CD ROM, 640x480 monitor supporting thousands of colors, 20MB hard disck space.

Network feature: No

3Dfx Acceleration: No

Availability: Out of Print

Before I start this review, lets define "obsidian," shall we? According to "Webster's Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary," an obsidian is a "volcanic glass that is generally black, banded, or spherultic and has a marked conchoidal fracture and a composition similar to rhyolite."

I really had no reason to define obsidian, I just like the word conchoidal.

Anyway, long before I first played Obsidian a couple years ago, I somehow ended up with a promotional poster of the game. I hung it up at my office , because the tag line at the bottom read "Your rules do not apply here." That line may be this game's best feature.

Actually, that's a bit harsh. Obsidian's not awful. I mean, it's not as bad as Riven or anything. But it's just...flat. I explored world after world and solved puzzle after puzzle, the whole time thinking, "I just don't get these people who don't use their turn signals. Why don't they? How hard is it to reach out with their finger and flip a switch? Is driving already so difficult for them?"

Obsidian starts you off in the woods, where you find an abandoned tent and an example of what the Newton should have become. Studying this PDA provides you with information you don't really need before entering the world of Obsidian, but the game won't seem to let you progress until you learn about the characters and their work. Therefore, I'll spare you any background here so that you won't have to sit through it twice. Suffice it to say that your friend has gone to Obsidian, and you, playing the character Lilah, are going after him.

Once you've entered the Bureau, things get nuts. A bunch of T.V. screens straight out of Terry Gilliam's "Brazil" give you orders and point you around, but they're not much help. Then again, what could be in a world like this? Up is down, down is left, left is Thursday, and Thursday is pudding. It's hard enough to find your way through this place, let alone solve any of the puzzles along the way. The good news, however, is that the graphics and sound remain entertaining when the gameplay becomes tedious. But I'll get to that later.

After you've read the hints included so that you can complete the six or so puzzles of the Bureau, you are taken to the Spider Realm, which looks like the soundstage for every episode's final battle scene in the TV series "Highlander." From this area, you have access to four different worlds, each of which has a puzzle to solve. Upon completion of this task, you can go back to a...control room, for lack of a better term...where you're given a card. Put the card in the slot, learn a bit about "the Machine" and what happened to your buddy, then you're off on another wacky adventure where "your rules do not apply."

The game goes on like this...and on like this...and on like this...and on like this...and on like this...until you're thinking, "Why don't I just shut this thing off and listen to Thomas Dolby's 'The Golden Age of Wireless' instead?"

Which brings me to the music. The soundtrack for Obsidian was scored by Thomas Dolby. Some of you older gamers may remember him as the artist who gave us such classics as "She Blinded Me with Science," "Hyperactive" and "Howard the Duck" (bad movie, good song). Thomas does a great job of setting the mood for each realm. This is good, as--aside from some nice graphics--there's little else to generate interest in this game. I was not compelled to discover new worlds here like I was with Myst (at which Obsidian takes a few nice jabs), and I couldn't have cared less about my buddy lost in Obsidian, unlike with Roxy in AMBER. There's a lot of sugar coating on Obsidian, but it's hollow inside...like an M&M with no chocolate. To top it off, the puzzles are extremely difficult for the average gamer. Even with a walkthrough, it still took me hours to solve a few of them. SegaSoft apparently realized this, as they soon started selling the game with a hintbook enclosed for a couple dollars more than the original asking price.

Oh, and one other petty annoyance. Hopefully, this was only the case with my copy, but not one of the five CDs sat properly in the case. They wouldn't lock down, so the CDs spilled out every time I opened it. No big deal, but it would've been had one of them gotten scratched...or maybe that would've done me a favor.

Despite its efforts, all Obsidian seems to be is a bunch of puzzles ala "The Seventh Guest," loosely held together by a tin foil-thin plot about "the Machine." Although it's not offensively bad, I don't suggest hunting down this game. Rent "Howard the Duck" instead. It's cheaper, it's shorter, and that Lea Thompson...she's kinda cute.

Recommended instead: Starship Titanic

Developer: The Digital Village

Publisher: Simon & Schuster Interactive

Raised on Intellivision and "Tron," Kirk Hiner has been an avid gamer ever since he was tall enough to look through the viewfinder on the Battlezone upright. Although he makes a living using a PC (not by choice) to design websites for Dynamics Online, Inc., Kirk never strays from his 9600/200 or 3400c for computer gaming. When he's not playing the latest Logicware release, he can either be found working on his next "never to be published" novel, rereading anything by Kurt Vonnegut or watching RAW is WAR.

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February 09, 2010